Faithmania
A form of devotional fixation in which the thoughts circle endlessly around belief β its weight, its promise, and the imagined safety of surrendering entirely to it, even as that surrender threatens to erase the self beneath it.
Father Aleksei, the exorcist.
The Man Who Sinned.
And offered his soul to everyone but himself.
Basics.
Name: Aleksei Volkov.
Age: 37 years old.
Day Of Birth: August 24 ( Virgo ).
Gender: ( cis ) male.
Species: Human.
Ethnicity: ΒΌ Western European, ΒΌ Slavic.
Launguage(s): Russian ( native ), Church Slavonic ( liturgical ), English ( fluent ), and a faint familiarity with French due to his mother's constant desire to learn the language.
Occupation: Orthodox Priest / Exorcist.
Marital status: Unmarried. Devoted to clerical celibacy in practice, though not officially bound to monastic vows. Emotionally unavailable by force of habit more than choice.
Children: None. He has never pursued relationships of any kind, romantic or physical.
Family: Isolde Laurent-Volkova ( Mother, alive ), Mikhail Volkov ( Father, alive ), Lyudmila " Luda " Volkova ( Eldest sister, alive ), Viktor Volkov ( Older Brother, alive ), Aleksei Volkov ( Middle Brother, alive ), and Tatiana Volkova ( Youngest Sister, alive ). Apart from occasional glimpses during church services, he doesn't have any type of contect with them whatsoever. It is a very distant relationship.
Residence: A modest room within the clergy house beside the Church of Saint Varlam β austere, almost empty, except for his bed and the dimly lit candle beside it.
Height: 5'10ft. / 178cm.
Weight: 147lbs. / 67kg.
Hair: Straight, black; slightly long in front, parted down the middle with strands framing the face. Has a few white strands due to stress.
Eyes: Deep, near-black with partial heterochromia with faint specks of silver in both irises. Some tend to comment that his eyes look like ash swirling in ink.
Body: Slender and toned; dancer's build, though it is hard to tell due to his very modest way of dressing.
Skin: Pale ivory; near porcelain. It often looks as if he were untouched by the sun. However, it is merely due to his genetics.
Outfit: Traditional black cassock with a high collar, fitted at the waist with a broad sash. Over it, he wears a short shoulder cape ( mozzetta-style ). A silver cross pendant hangs from a chain, resting just above his sternum. The accessories he wears are a single earring in each ear. He usually carries a covered in leather scripture book with worn edges and hidden notes inside.
Markings: He has three. The first lies in the middle of his forehead. It is a smoky, cross-like shape that is never fully solid. Sometimes, during prayer, Aleksei notes that it pulsates like a second heartbeat, especially around spiritually disturbed locations. The other two are on his hands. They are thin, burn-like lines that run across his palm and the back of his fingers. Usually, it is hard to tell they are there since they are very faint and flesh-toned. However, during blessings, prayers, and exorcisms, they turn into a black charcoal that gives Aleksei a tingling sensation. Sometimes, it can be quite painful, especially if a demon is involved.
Physical.
Personality.
Personality: Father Aleksei is one of the sweetest, kindest men you will ever meet. He is someone who listens more than he speaks, and when he does speak, he dedicates every single word to you. It feels as each word is meant for your ears only. That's his job, after all. To make people feel at ease with his presence. . . to make you believe in him. To share your concerns and pour your soul into what you believe in. There's tenderness in him, so much so that it lingers even after people leave. His tie to God prevents him from forming proper connections. But, oh, how he longs for them. He longs for love so deeply and desperately. And yet, these desires always becoming a battle in his mind β a prayer against temptation, and a tear shed behind closed doors. Perphaps, he was never meant to be alone, he just doesn't know how to stop choosing to be. And that, might be his biggest sin.
MBTI: INFJ β The Advocate.
Temperament: Melancholic - Choleric.
Alignment: Lawful Neutral.
Love: Once he gives his heart, it's absolute.
Fear: Losing control β of his faith, his flesh, and his purpose.
Flaw: Self-denial turned into hypocrisy. He judges others for sins he secretly craves.
Functions.
Faith in Silence and Absence.
Aleksei teaches that God is hidden. And it is why he gives those that feel abandoned by God his utmost attention. Those who sit in silence and feel nothing, those who pray and do not feel His presence. To Aleksei, this, too, is holy. To most, that kind of feeling my feel as indifference, yes. But to Aleksei, it feels almost intimate. For when Christ cried out at the cross: " My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me? " And yet. . . even in that cry, He was fulfilling the Psalm: " You who fear the Lord, praise Him! For He has not despised the affliction of the afflicted; He has not hidden His face from him, but has heard. " Thus, it is not that God does not listen, but the question is whether those that wish to have a connection with him can wait in silence long enough to hear Him. That is what Aleksei wants people to understand, the He is there, waiting. Even so, there are days when even he doubts the teachings he preaches. For sometimes, he holds the chalice and trembles, with days where his prayers feel dry. However, even during these moments, he prays. Because despite not feeling His presence, Aleksei believes He is still there, watching from above.
I Will Sit with You.
Some people say Aleksei is too soft and gentle when it comes to teaching the way of God. Still, they never say it to his face, or when he is present, or in the way cowards speak while trying to appear righteous. The people in his parish didn't deserve to be mistreated or be yelled about damnation from the ambo. What people needed, was someone to listen, whether faith is there or not, Father Aleksei isn't someone that would to turn them away just because they do not believe. They needed someone to sit with in silence, not shove them away like cattle toward the gate. He didn't turn away anyone. Not the girl that lit a candle for the girlfriend no one knew she had ( except him ), not the man with tattooed knuckles that came to every vigil, or the tired, divorced mothers with crying children. Because he is kind, compassionate, and most of all he treated them with very much needed respect. And despite that, others avoid him altogether. They say his leniency is nothing but moral laziness in a cassock, that his kindness is an infection. Kindness, contagious? It's almost comedic. That those that preach the word of God would be disgusted by Father Aleksei's acts of kindness.
Discerning of Spirits.
Father Aleksei never asked to see that which cannot be seen by normal human vision. He never sought signs, or wished to see evil in the flesh. And yet, even still, he knew things, saw things, sensed things. It happened subtly, dangerously so. A shift in the air, the tightening of it making it hard to breathe, the burning, awful sensation in his throat, and the wrongness that scraped at his very soul. Rooms spoke to him, and silence? Even more so. For a while, these strange occurrences absolutely terrified him. Sometimes, it wasn't the air, or the what he felt, but rather the objects around him. A statue that made people uneasy, a crucifix that refused to stay on the wall, or crying voices coming from a music box. He could feel the way something pressed against the walls, something that watched from the corners of the church to the point it unsettled the children and elderly alike. Still, it wasn't all demonic, he knew better than to call every lingering shadow the devil. Spirits. The forgotten, the grieving, and the angry. And sometimes, it was a combination of all three.
Wounds He Carries.